How are you?

"How are you?" Such a simple question. In most cases, the person asking doesn't really care about how the person really is. It's just small talk, really. However, when the person being asked the question has an answer other than "Oh, I'm good" or "Things are fine", this question almost stings. The person really wants to tell them what is really going on in their life. How their heart is breaking, how they feel so alone, and insignificant in the world, how terrified they are of the future. But we don't do that, do we? We tuck all that inside, smile and tell them what they want to hear: "Everything is going good."

So, in that case, "How are you, Claire?" Honestly, it's been rough for a while. I have given everything to God. All that I have going on is in His hands. However, I know that satan is at work. He can take all these things, even though I have turned them all in to God, and keep bringing them up in my mind. He does this with every little aspect and let's it build and build. I finally had to break down, turn down the music, and say aloud "Satan, in the name of my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, get OUT! Get out of my life and quit bringing me down. Stop taking away my joy and strength."

Now things did not instantly get better after that. However, God is helping me through everything. Throughout all of this I have had the attitude of "Okay God, what are you trying to teach me?" I have been keeping my eyes open for something from Him. I might not know what I'm supposed to learn until a later time. I am fine with that. God helped me through one of the major complications this week. And I praise Him. I've been praising Him through it all.

I was sure by now, God, that You would have reached down

and wiped our tears away

stepped in and saved the day.

But once again, I say amen

and it's still raining.

And as the thunder rolls,

I barely hear you whisper through the rain,

"I'm with you"

and as your mercy falls

I raise my hands and praise the God who gives

and takes away.

I will praise you in this storm.

And I will lift my hands.

For You are who You are

no matter where I am

and every tear I've cried

You hold in Your hand.

You've never left my side

and though my heart is torn

I will praise You in this storm.